Editing Questions: Narrative

1.  The strengths in the essay were descriptive moments through out the whole thing.

2.  Areas of improvement are, spelling, grammar, word usage and placement.

3.  My favorite literary device is a strong description of moments during the story.

4.  When the storm came and they were walking on the road looking for help.

Thoughts on a "Good Narrative"

1. My narrative involves the reader in the story by giving a large amount of introductory detail, like the setting and what was going on at the time.
2. In my narrative I relate events in sequence by introducing them in chronological order of how they happened.
3. In my narrative I include a detailed observation of the people, places, and settings of the different parts through out my narrative, like the play ground and the hospital.
4. I my narrative I include important changes through out the story, I describe the tensions and conflicts through out the story, like when they moved me to a different hospital bed.
5. I tell the story in my point of view through out the narrative.
6. I focus on past events, like pain, and discomfort through out my narrative and relate on the connection between past and present, and how I would never want anyone to have to go through it.
7.  I created a main point or idea through out the story of it being the worst pain I have ever experienced, physically and emotionally.

Helen Keller Narrative Response

1.  I thought that in the narrative, Helen Keller gave a good description to what her world was like.  Although I will never get the full sense of this, she did well on explaining what it is like. 

2.  The most interesting part to me is how when she finally realized that the words she had been spelling out actually represented the item that she was spelling.  That transformation from not understanding to understanding i felt was most interesting.

3.  I was surprised that she was able to take on this new spelling so well when she was both blind and deaf.

4.  This did not change my outlook on Helen Keller.  It did not change my outlook because I have seen a movie about her where all of this is described.

5. 
     1.)  The afternoon sun penetrated the mass of honeysuckle that covered the porch, and fell on my upturned face. My fingers lingered almost unconsciously on the familiar leaves and blossoms which had just come forth to greet the sweet southern spring.

     2.)  Have you ever been at sea in a dense fog, when it seemed as if a tangible white darkness shut you in, and the great ship, tense and anxious, groped her way toward the shore with plummet and sounding-line, and you waited with beating heart for something to happen?

     3.)  When I finally succeeded in making the letters correctly I was flushed with childish pleasure and pride. Running downstairs to my mother I held up my hand and made the letters for doll. I did not know that I was spelling a word or even that words existed; I was simply making my fingers go in monkey-like imitation.

6.  A narrative is more engaging than a biography because a narrative is written by the actual person it is about.  It is important to get a personal perspective because nobody can explain your feelings as well as you yourself can.

7.  - Family trip
     - Personal experience
     - A hardship overcome
     - Childhood memory
     - A time when I was proud of myself

Where I'm From

Where I'm From

By: Steve Lohner

I am from hot sand and salty sea,

Late night fishing trips, with big flounder,

Seeing the lights of ships, moving across the darkness.

I am from The beach house, the dark wood and sturdy stilts.

I am from my sister taking for ever in the bathroom,

from sleeping the entire way down while my sister takes pictures of me.

I am from going out to dinner and shopping with my mom.

I am from FUNKYZEIT MIT BRÜNO,

From Da Ali G show, I am from Borat.

I am from blowing up fireworks, to eating dirt at Fridays.

I am from the mini pool in my friends backyard, to trips to her lake house.

I am from camping at lake hope, the canoe on the water, catching small mouth bass,

from cooking corn on the fire.

I am from sailing dad on hoover reservoir, from Interlake 1274,

from winning all the races, from burgers after everything was packed.

I am from swimming in Georges pool, from building Legos in his basement,

from hiding under the pull out bed, from shooting bags of pine needles.

I am from sleeping in on weekends, from being late to school.

I am from the artificial Christmas tree,

from my mom reading the night before Christmas to my sister and I

on Christmas eve.

I am from little ceacers pizza on summer nights,

from basketball a the rec center.

Survey Swaqq

1.  Nish Nish

2.  Short Stories
     Jokes

3.  Comic Strip
     Non-Fiction
     Stuff on Internet

4.  Anyting that could be ahiah or nish nish.

5.  A and B

6.  I like to argue when I know im right.

7.  I like to participate when I know something abouth the topic being discussed.

8.  I am a basketballer, I am a milk mane, and I am the host of Funkyzeit.

9.  I played basketball, and I went on a hunting trip.

10.  Nope.

11.  None